


Stumble As I Walk

by cardiganfucker



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-29
Updated: 2011-08-29
Packaged: 2017-10-23 04:48:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/246419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cardiganfucker/pseuds/cardiganfucker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John is drunk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stumble As I Walk

John was drunk. Seriously mind boggling drunk. Drunk enough to make Charlie Sheen seem like a saint and Justin Beiber have talent. He couldn’t remember how he had gotten at the pub he was at. He was pretty sure it had something to do with Harry and Sherlock. Well when he could still semi reason he assumed so. He was at the point where his actions would make a great Funniest Home Videos segue. He also wasn’t thinking much of Harry and more of Sherlock. Though now he was drunk enough, his flatmate was ‘Sherly’ or ‘My-Biggest-Fucking-Problem-Mate- Let-Me-Tell-Ya.’

His fingers were wiggly. He couldn’t tell if he was moving them or not. He kept staring at the tips. As if trying to figure out why he had finger tips. Really, what was with this entire finger bending nonsense any how?

It was to grip things. Like…ropes. To sails! Like a pirate.

John then made the decision to text First Mate Sherly and inform of his promotion from scallywag to Officer.

___

 

From: John Watson

ur not a dog anywmore your aoffice.

-Dr. Sexy Pyjamas  
___

From: Sherlock:

Pardon? An office is a building John, which I cannot be. Though I do think I would rather be an office then a dog.

-SH

___

From: John Watson

i dunnt even kmnow sherlty im so blurry eyeed.

-Dr. Sexy Pyjamas

___

From: Sherlock Holmes

I would offer to come and get you but I can’t.

-SH

___

From: John Watson

Psssh I dont kneed yu imm doiung fone

-Dr. Sexy Pyjamas

___

From Sherlock Holmes

I’m doing fone too, John.

-SH

___

Sherlock as a rule did not drink. He did not go to social gatherings with people from work and he did not drink. Until an hour ago.

“Sherlock, you never leave your flat except to sniff around dead bodies.”

“Not your sniffer dog.” The consulting detective said not bothering to look up from a victim’s thumb.

Donovan isn’t sure but she thinks she saw him lick it.

“Yes, I know you aren’t. But come out with us tonight. For a drink.” Lestrade said in a amazingly seeming sincere.

Anderson visibly cringed.

“Umm. no.” Sherlock responded having the answer ready before Lestrade asked, now comparing both thumbs.

Donovan was now sure that he had licked one of the thumbs.

“Sherlock,” Anderson bumped Lestrade in a ‘shut-up-goddammit-you-tried-now-shut-up’ way. Lestrade switched gears, “Can you get anything from it?”

Sherlock stood up looking slightly offended.

Lestrade rolled his eyes realizing his error. Had he gotten anything from it, what an insult. Who was he, Anderson?

“It was the violin instructor. Check his left pocket. Notice the markings on his neck smell like rosin. And know he is sleeping with the instructor’s wife.” Sherlock turned with a dramatic coat spin and headed for the door.

Lestrade followed him, “Sherlock wait.” Sherlock reluctantly slowed. “Just come have a drink with us. One drink. It can even be water.”

And thus Sherlock Holmes ended up at a pub.

Like most people who are dragged places they don’t want to be, he planted himself in a corner. Lestrade thought this was bullshit and decided to more or less inform him of this fact.

He had already started drinking.

On the way there.

From a flask.

Sherlock had ordered water but little be known to him, Lestrade had cancelled this.

“Sherlock, drink this.”

It looked like water.

“Doo it.” Lestrade breathed on him. He had his face resting on Sherlock’s collarbone because his head felt really fucking heavy.

“Why…what is it?” Sherlock asked not ready to trust him. Especially drunk him.

“It’s…good.” He reassured.

“It’s not water.” The consulting detective stated.

“Nope. Drink it fast enough and it will taste like water though.” He said forcing the glass into Sherlock’s hand.

Sherlock looked at it. The suddenly a very little part of him in the back of his mind shaped like Gary Busey yelled ‘what the hell, do it.’

And so he did.

Shit hit the fan.

___

From: John Watson

Sherly iineed a ride back o thr flat.

-Dr. Sexy Pyjamas

___

From: Sherlock Holmes

Stop being so whiny, Jesus.

-SH

___

From: John Watson

bitchface

-Dr. Sexy Pyjamas

___

From: Sherlock Holmes

I’m allowed to be. I’m ginger now.

-SH

___

From John Watson

wat.

-Dr. Sexy Pyjamas

___


End file.
